Luray Caverns

Fried Eggs

Today the family and I had a memorable experience. We took a two hour drive to West Va to check out the famous Luray Caverns. The cavern has been highly commercialized and guided tours now run the show, but it was still an incredible sight. The caverns are adorned with massive stalagmites, stalactites and other geologic wonders. The most incredible sight was man made, but simply amazing. If you don't

These were Everywhere!

know it or not, each stalactite has a unique sound when tapped. So some genius thought it would a cool idea to make an organ that tapped stalactites of different sizes to produce various tones! There was also an amazing drip formation that took on the appearance of fried eggs. And a stalactite that formed from above while a stalagmite formed from below and the two fused together forming the infamous "bride and groom" statue. A glowing pool of water (may have been enhanced by light bulbs) called the wishing well where you could throw a coin and make a wish. Don't even ask to know what I wished for or else it won't come true and I really want it to happen. There were just so many amazing "rooms" and formations that you could spend hours down there examining them and still not noticing everything. It's the type of place that even if you worked there and guided tours everyday you would still notice something new each time! My only complaint about the tour was the fact that it was a tour and you were herded around like cattle from each room to the next. It would've been much more enjoyable to simply walk the caverns with your own small group and taking as much time as you like to see it all. All the same,  I would still highly recommend checking it out if you are ever in West Virginia or near the Shenandoah National Park (which by the way was closed...bummer).

Wishing Well

Bride and Groom

Christmas Dinner

My first ever trip to the east coast has been great so far. I've enjoyed lots of family time and tons of lounging. Just how I would picture my Christmas vacation, at least for a few days. I do wish I could be skiing the amazing Utah snow and hanging out with the family in the evenings. As you are all probably very interested in knowing what my favorite gift from Santa was....I will now indulge. Santa was generous enough to bring me a helmet cam (but only because I have been a very good boy this year) to film my many extreme outdoor activities so you and I can relive their amazing moments. Here is my first use of the camera and it's editing program. The video captures our Christmas blunder, the Southard family had it's very first Christmas dinner without meat! Hilarious and another great memory to add to the many great ones over the years. Another great memory that we made this year was dressing my Dad up as Santa and taking our annual family picture with him instead of that phony dick at the mall who smells like BO and doesn't care about anyone over the age of 14. Anyways, I'm super stoked about my newest toy! My blog is about to get a whole lot cooler if I can actually make the time to do a post from time to time. Hopefully some epic plowder riding ensues!

Plowder

Winter can be such an amazing time of the year and its totally weather dependent in my case. For most people snow storms mean more stress and hassle. But to me and my fellow powder whore's its a small price to pay to ride new snow. We get stoked seeing our cars covered in snow each morning as we head out the door for work. Albeit, we don't really enjoy having to work when there's fresh pow, but it still puts a smile on my face.

 This past week the entire west coast has been getting a ton of precipitation flowing in from the Pacific. Utah has been given an amazing early Christmas present. We have received over 50 inches of snow in the past week alone! Our snow pack has finally crested 100" and its still December! It's every snow shredders dream. Freshies, powtay, riding the white wave and plowder are some of my favorites of describing the new snow.

Unfortunately, but still excitingly enough I am leaving Utah and its amazing snow pack to visit my family in Virginia for the Holidays. I've never been back east and am curious as to why I have such a bias toward it, despite never having experienced its culture and landscape. For some reason I am repelled by the east. Maybe its the crowded cities and no significant mountains part. But, I'm being honest here, I love to snowboard and quite frankly, if your state doesn't cater to my pow pow cravings then I'm just not interested. Snow or not, I'm very happy to be visiting the fam and am anxious to see them. Hopefully I'll find a good way to distract myself from the plowder here in Utah while I'm MIA. Shred hard my friends and Merry Christmas!

Arsenal!!

Today is a massive day for English Football. My hatred for Man United once again comes boiling to the surface as we are set to battle with the Red Devils for first place in the EPL. It's time for Arsenal to step up their game against their biggest rivals and shine. We've had a rough go against United (and the other "title contenders") in the past few seasons, but I feel that this is our year to regain the crown. We are team full of belief, ability and most importantly maturity (finally!) to do something with that belief. We've been regarded as contenders in recent years solely because of our dominance in the early 2000's, but everyone knew we didn't really have the goods to bring home the EPL title. We've lacked that killer instinct that all the title winner's seem to possess. And by that I mean having other players step up when key players are injured, squeaking out wins with nitty gritty performances and taking care of the smaller teams. No one this season seems to be emulating these characteristics as all the big teams have faltered a few times this season already. It is likely that all the key men for these teams are still feeling the effects of the World Cup and battling with tired legs and niggling injuries (such as Fabregas's hamstring woes.)

 Despite this, we still have a colossal match on our hands today! One that I look forward to every season. This one today is a little more significant to me this year because Arsenal have a great opportunity to take hold of the Premiere League title race and put some distance between themselves and their challengers at the top of the table. It's also meaningful because I have a little bet with Mr. Emory (who just happens to be a Man U fan) that if Arsenal beat Man U, then he has to come visit SLC (finally) within the next 6 months and vice versa if Man U are victorious today. This is big! See you soon EM!!

Prediction: It's going to be a tight one today. The game is at Old Trafford so obviously Man U have the advantage and will likely score. A win would be momentous and massive statement for Arsenal if we were to take all three points today. I don't think either team is willing to put caution to the wind and risk defeat at such a crucial point in the season. Man U is still undefeated this season, although they have tied almost half of their games thus far so chalk up another draw....1-1. Vidic to score off the corner first and Nasri with another piece of magic to level it up. Come on you GUNNERS and put Man U in the place like we did a few seasons ago....

Dexter

Tonight is the season finale of Dexter. It's an awfully grotesque show that has this unexplainable power to grab the attention of millions of Americans, luring them into watching a socially inept creature who lives a lie and tricks everyone into thinking he's a normal 9-5 daddy. In actuality he's a mass murderer of the earth's scum. It's a great show because it relates to people with violence and I'm just speaking for myself here, but I, in some sadistic way love to see Dexter killing evil men who committed heinous crimes they have gotten away with. Tonight we'll see Dexter take down another bad guy, but the real question is whether he is going to get away with all his murders and will he lose another love? My prediction is that Dexter is going to kill Jordan Chase, but in the end Lumen is going to take the fall for Dexter's murders and Deb is going to finally realize her brother is a killer, but she's going to accept him for what he is. And Boston boy is taking the fall for Dexter's murder of Liddy. Hmmmm. I'm getting a little antsy for this to play out. Dexter Dexter!

Holiday Bulge

"Don't dig your grave with your knife and fork:" -English Proverb (They are so wise)

It's officially the Holiday season and maybe I am a little tardy in acknowledging this, but I know it's in full swing when I start hearing Christmas Songs playing at work (uggh). The holiday season also signifies that time of year of when people just start baking copious amounts of sweet, rich foods and handing them out like they are kittens from a litter of 50! I don't quite understand the change that sweeps over us Americans during this time of year, but everyone seems to think that it's a great idea to add a layer or two to the winter coat of your family, friends and coworkers by sharing the gift of baking and delicious dishes. Just about everyday of work for the past two weeks there has been a basket of sweets sitting in the break room for all to indulge. Thanks!

Yummy in my Tummy!

In reality, we all need to think twice before we take that next cookie or piece of chocolate fudge during this time of year. Most of us aren't getting much exercise since the days are growing shorter and the temperature is hovering around freezing. Many leading sources believe that the average adult will gain 7 to 10 lbs over the Holiday Season! WTF! The sad part is that the people that put on this weight are the ones most likely to keep it as well. They'll tell themselves that their New Year's resolution is to lose 15lbs, but will quit their diet after two weeks and retain all that lovely extra cellulite that parties in all the wrong places on our bodies.

The dreaded "Belly Fat"

I love the holidays, don't get me wrong, but I find it quite depressing that for so many of us they signify a time to overindulge and neglect our health. This shit affects the rest of your life. It won't kill you to not try every dish at your next Christmas Party or not make 10 different dishes for your Christmas dinner for 5 people! Just take it back a notch.

Here are a few tips to keep that weight down during this wonderful time of the year:

1. Weigh yourself daily. Go ahead, don't turn a blind eye on your worst fear and step on that scale. Many of us "pretend" or try to convince ourselves we are staying the same weight by avoiding the scale. If you weigh yourself daily, it will be a constant reminder to keep the weight off.

2. Be aware of what you eat throughout the day. People "forget" they had four cookies at work and then eat four more later that same day. Try to be conscious of everything you are eating.

3. Always look for opportunities to move. Talk a brisk walk during a down time when spending time with family. If you have some spare time go for a jog or the gym instead of sitting in front of the computer or TV.

4. Learn to say "No" or "I'll pass." You don't have to say "yes" to everything.

5. Eat a little before you head out to that Christmas Party or Family gathering. Hunger can undo the best intentions.

6. Clear the table when finished eating. I always find myself picking at left over food at the table just because its there.

8. Alcohol has a lot of bad calories too. Keep that in mind.

7. Most importantly, Remember that the holidays are about friends, family and being thankful for them. --NOT FOOD--

Happy Holidays Everyone and remember to pray for snow!

Its not me, its my nature

Bad things happen, whether for a reason or not, and it's hard to come to grips with why or how. It can be extremely difficult to deal with, consuming every free sedentary moment throughout your day. Other times things happen and we just shrug okay and get on with our lives. Every so often something happens that is amazing and we don't ask questions about why or how we just soak in the goodness and life seems so great and simple. Why is this? Why is it that we, as humans, dwell on the negative? Asking questions, trying to get to the bottom of whatever problem, digging deeper and deeper, completely absorbed, uncovering more than we wished for until it becomes a skeleton in our closet. We analyze and ruminate until it is always there and incredibly painful to recall. We pick at every detail until all that is left is a red inflamed abscess that has little resemblance to its origin. When we finally realize how grotesque its become, we slap on some ointment and a band aid, try to forget and hope it heals. On the flip side, when something positive happens in our lives our natural instinct is to think we deserve whatever fortunate occurrence has materialized before our eyes. We say to ourselves, "Damn, that is great and so am I, more things like this should happen to me." We really don't consider why or how for more than a few hours. We take it in and instantly want more. Our appetite for satisfaction grows and grows, always wanting more, swelling exponentially. We evolve into gluttonous, rapacious, green-eyed monsters.

This post sucks.

Teton Pass

The rocky mountains went off this weekend! My lovely girlfriend, Leah, and I decided to take a little break from Utah this past weekend and head up to Victor, ID to visit our good friends John and Kendle. While there we were given the greatest gift of all, fresh powder! Over 2 feet fell! With Saturday snowfall totals at 18 inches in some places. It was snowgasmic! We skied on Saturday and Sunday off Teton Pass at Glory Mountain and Edleweiss. They are both extremely popular and safe places to ski when avalanche danger increases. If felt like we were in mid January, not late November. The snow was light, fluffy and bottomless. It was my first time on the splitboard since last ski season and Leah's first time touring with AT gear. She was great! John and Kendle are finally seeing the light and are now totally geared up to backcountry ski all winter long. WOO! We made effortless turns down gently sloping terrain at the tree lines because the avalanche danger was considerable. Even so, we all got that very special feeling that tickles your senses when you surf the white wave. It almost doesn't seem real because of how light and floaty the snow feels beneath your powder stick(s), its probably the closet thing to walking on a cloud.

It was also really great to get to hang out with John and Kendle and peek into their lives up in Idaho/Wyoming.. They just bought their first house! Wow! They really are growing up. They've chosen a first rate location to settle down in (that is if you love the outdoors, mountain especially) and in a way, a small piece of me envies that. It's also a bonus for me, because I will always have a warm, cozy and friendly place to stay whenever I want to ski the Tetons. I'm really glad we made the trip up to see them. I miss them a lot and am stoked they only live a short 4.5 hour drive from Salt Lake, that is, unless it isn't blizzarding and the roads are a nightmare like they were for our journey home. But oh well, we need the snow. With the holidays fast approaching and ski season ramping up......Let it SNOW!

Amazing Soccer Goals

Scoring a goal in soccer is an amazing feeling. Your teammates rush towards you to congratulate you, almost tackling you, their jubilation radiating, your adrenaline pulsating. In that moment, you are completely filled with joy and euphoria. On any stage, this simple tasks intoxicates your body and mind with ecstasy. I loved scoring goals as a player and even in simple kick around games. The passion of scoring a goal is something that you will always remember.

My most memorable goal came in my second to last game at BCC as a Sophomore. We were playing against Southwest Oregon CC in a single elimination game to make the playoffs. The game was in the second half of golden goal overtime and only minutes away from the dreaded penalty shootout. An opponent had the ball inside his own half and my teammate pressured him hard and forced him into a heavy touch, I intervened and swiped the ball from him about 35 yards away from goal. I had only two defenders in front of me and the goal with one more chasing hard from behind, I feinted right and went left and got half a step on the defenders. At this point I was nearing the 18 yard box and streaking towards the left side of the goal, the keeper began to move off his line to cut down the angle. I was running at full speed with three defenders crowding around me when I hit a low, rolling shot that went just beyond the outstretched keepers dive and off the far post and into the goal! The game was over. WE HAD WON! My teammates were chasing me all over the field and I was dodging every one of them until they tackled me at the midfield line. It was one of the greatest feelings of my entire life. I was ecstatic and so was everyone else. My coach gave me the biggest hug after the game, I was the hero.

Every year in the soccer world there are simply stunning goals that literally take your breath away. FIFA honors these goals by making a shortlist of the ten best goals and gives the Puskas Award to the most breathtaking goal scored that year. You can watch the nominees here:  
PUSKAS AWARD. (amazing goal videos)
Their is a wonderful volleyed backheel that just doesnt make sense, a few thunderbolt strikes from way out, astonishing displays of skill as attackers breeze past defenders and score with style and long streaking runs filled with power and pace and lovely finishing strikes. My personal favorite is Giovanni Van Bronckhorst's rocket from 40 yards out against Uruguay in the World Cup Semi Finals. Absolutely majestic!!

"Oh my God!" shrieked a nurse. "You are ridiculous!" another cried out. These were the first words I heard as I walked into work and scanned my badge to clock in. No good morning or how are you, just hysteria. I thought to myself, "maybe I should have just used the side door."

 

As soon as I stepped outside the chilly air took a hold of me and shook me awake. I mounted my bike and clipped in to my pedals. I had just pulled out of my residential road and onto Bengal Blvd and began picking up speed immediately. The icy cold began cutting deeper into my face and my entire body was stinging with the intense cold. "Shit, maybe this was a bad idea," immediately popped into my head. It was 6am, pitch black and 30 degrees F and I was traveling at 35mph downhill and not generating much internal heat. Factoring those two numbers together the wind chill was equivalent to -1 degrees F! No wonder I was freezing my balls off and second guessing my decision to bike into work. I was mashing on the pedals to try and generate some body heat After a solid 10 minutes I began to warm up and get the feeling back into my hands. As soon as I felt the warmth creep into my body, I knew I was going to make it. 

Brrr

Biking in extremely cold conditions isn't very much fun at first. But, if you dress properly and are able to push through the initial chills, it's actually quite enjoyable. A few items will make your ride much more enjoyable:

• Shoe Covers - nothing is worse than having cold feet on a ride because you really have no way to warm them up. Shoe covers block the wind and keep what little heat your feet generate in.
• Winter Gloves - Fingers and feet are the hardest parts of the body to keep warm on a ride. Well insulated gloves are a must. Plain and simple. I wear ski gloves when it's really cold and just a wind blocker shell if it's above 40 F.
• Balaclava or headband - You lose a ton of heat through your head when it's only covered by your helmet. On super cold days put on a balaclava to keep your neck, lips and head nice and cozy. It takes a little while to get used to breathing with, but stick with it. Ear warmers are nice on the days when a balaclava is too much but you still need to keep your ears warm.
• Jacket - Invest in a jacket that is wind proof and still breathes well. If you use a jacket that doesn't breathe well, you'll be sweating buckets after 15 minutes and will end up getting cold later on because all that moisture you are creating. Pit zips are nice too. 

Even if it's crazy cold out, you still can bike. Make it a test of your mental strength to go out and get on your bike and push through the cold. You'll thank me later.

Cheesy

I wrote this poem for a special someone. Yes, I know its extremely cheesey, but I really enjoyed writing it and wanted to share it. It is inspired by my love for the outdoors and a great girl in my life.

Mt. Baker Backcountry

you're my number one,
my saturday,
the snow in my canyon,
my powder day,
the red in my wine,
my favorite moment in time,
damn! I'm glad you're mine,
you're my funnest climb,
the chain on my bike,
my lifestyle,
the woman I like,
you make me smile.



 I think I'm going to quit my job, drink red wine, smoke lots of marijuana and write love poems all day. I'd say I have a 50/50 chance at making a name for myself. Oh, and I'd like to give a big shout out to Wal-Mart for putting those red roses right next to the check out aisle without them, this poem would've never been created.

Opening Day

So there I was, down and out. Losing hope. Sinking like a stone in the sea. My blood was boiling and my core body temperature was 101 F. The light was getting brighter and brighter, everything else was fading into nothingness. Bruce Springstein's "Blinded by the Light" was playing in the background and I could feel my will to live burning away. I was strapped to a table and completely naked. There was a team of green suits gathering around me, whispering back and forth on how they should end my life. I opened my eyes to take one last look at the world as I knew it and realized that I had awoken. It was all a dream.

And speaking of dreams, an actual dream of mine has come true! Brighton Ski Resort opens this Friday, November 12th. I'll be there shredding the gnar, hitting rocks and tree stumps with my slay blade. It won't matter though because there will be some snow and snow is all that I desire at the moment. I'll see you on the mountain!

65 and Sunny!

It's november and it was absolutely amazing outdoors. The sun is radiating ultra violet rays from the perfect angle. Not too acute nor obtuse, just right. It's great t-shirt and shorts weather when you are partaking in stimulating outdoor activities. The body thrives in this atmosphere like a well oiled piston firing smoothly. The somatic nervous system is innervating your external muscles without delay, every capillary is dilated to the max and your entire body is flooded with oxygen. These are the days that make me happy. They give me a better sense of well being. I love these days, but I also love winter. For now I will enjoy them and squeeze in every last summer activity that I can. I'll even go rollerblading, that's how great it is outside.

Home Brew

Last night I made the wort for my latest home brew! I'm conjuring up a hoppy, red, winter style warmer. It should be delicious if everything works out. There are so many factors in the process that could taint the beer that I find the whole process a little stressful. Everything has to be sterilized, the yeast has to be prepped, hops and other ingredients added at exact times, it's time consuming and you have to attentive in the kitchen throughout the duration of the boil. Don't get me wrong though, once all the work is done and you are sipping on your very own concoction of beer, it's very rewarding. It's also a great way to impress chicks. I love having 5 gallons of beer chilling down in my basement, it's all for me! (besides the ones that I share with friends) They will all be in a neat formation just waiting for me to rip off their tops and let me drink in their frothy goodness. The entire batch should be done in about 3-4 weeks. I'm very excited to get drinking!

Perplexed. Warning: this is not a Joke.

So here I am contemplating another mystery of the universe. A bonafide brain buster, well, to me anyways. The thought never even crossed my mind until today. I mean seriously, why would I think about another man that way? Why would I wonder what he has or doesn't have? Now hold on a second, I know where you're going with this because I am deliberately taking advantage of the perversion that lives inside all of us. But, sorry to disappoint, I'm not taking this down the homosexual hallway.

Kevin Connoly: Simply Amazing

His name is Kevin Connolly and he's actually an incredible human being. He's probably the baddest dude on the planet, well, I take that back. He's probably the baddest three foot tall dude out there. I can reasonably say this with some confidence because how many three feet tall people do you know? I know zero. Kevin was born without legs, no legs! He's all torso. Nothing below. It's a phenomenon known as Amelia, a medical wonder fuck up without any sensible explananation other than God forgot to put a pair of legs on this guy when he was baking in the oven. Despite his obvious disadvantages, he's made a name for himself by turning his defect into a premium perk. He is a skiing phenom that has competed in the X Games in the mono ski race (taking silver), locals at Montana's Big Sky call him the Cyborg because of his badass mono ski with an integrated snowmobile suspension allowing him to ride the gnarliest terrain he wants. He's written an inspirational autobiography called "Double Take" and created an iconic photographic documentary called "The Rolling Exhibition" where he simply captures unsuspecting people's reactions as they gawk at his inadequacy, or so they think.

All this has given him the choice of doing whatever he wants with his time because he doesn't have to work the normal 9 to 5. He travels, he designs new toys to replace his "lack there of" and he's trying to bring awareness to other people with Amelia across the globe. He's also a legit ski bum in the winter's, getting more face shots than most rippers on the mountain, which is something that I am very envious of. I am in no way trying to bring this guy down. He's quite possibly more man than me! Which brings me to my original reason for writing this blog. I have been picking my brain over this all day and still can't come to the conclusion. This might be a little immoral and insensitive of me, but there are times when my curiosity outweighs my ethics and this is definitely one of those times. I know I'm beating around the bush, but I'm almost embarrassed to bring this up. Ok, so here it is: Does this guy have a wah wah wee wah? Yeah, I said it, does he have the frank and beans, the one-eyed cave explorer, the reason we all exist? I've looked all over the internet and haven't found a clue, it's like everyone is avoiding the question. Where is the cutoff? I'm thinking about this from a medical perspective, does he have a sacral plexus or a pelvic bone? I personally believe he does, the world isn't that messed up, is it? If my assumptions are wrong, it will confirm my belief that there really isn't a God. Say it isn't so! But I need to know for sure. Please help a confused soul. Do you have the answer? What do you think?

What Do YOU think?

Power to the Core

A strong core is incredibly important in any sport and is key to having a hott bod. Many people are under the impression that the core is just the abdominal muscles, they are wrong. Your core stabilizes your spine, pelvis and shoulders and runs the entire length of the torso. These muscles help control movements, transfer energy, shift body weight and move in any direction. Your core is where you generate power and provides the foundation for any physical activity. As a cyclist, climber and snowboarder as strong core is something I value and am always looking for new exercises to strengthen my core. Here are some of my favorite core exercises, most of which include using a stability ball:

•  Stability Ball Alternating Crunch: Sit on ball and form flat platform with your back. The ball should be just above the small of your back. Cross your arms on your chest. Do a sit-up, hold for one second at peak and contract your abs then come back down. Then come up to the left side, then center, then right side and so continue the same rotation. Do 2 sets of 25 reps.  

 

•  Balancing Seated Twist: Sit in crunch position on the floor and form 45 degree angle with you back and bring your feet off the floor with your knees halfway bent. Hold a medicine ball with your arms straight out and twist your torso side to side while keeping your feet off the ground. Do 2 sets of 20 reps.

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• Jackknife with Ball: Use a stability ball and put your feet (laces down) on top of ball and arms supporting yourself in push-up position. Bend at the knees and roll ball as close to your chest as possible then straighten legs back out to starting position. Do 2 sets of 15 reps.

•  Plank Lift your body up onto forearms and toes and keep your back straight. Do 2 sets 1 minute each.
• Side Plank: Prop upper body on bent forearm and push your hips toward the ceiling. Do 2 sets 30 seconds each side.

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• Leg Lift w/ Ball: Lay on back and hold a swiss between your feet. Keeps legs as straight as possible and lift legs off the ground (flex at waist, keep legs straight). Flex back down but don't let ball touch the ground. Do 2 sets 15 reps.

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•  Leg Curl w/ Stability Ball: Some folks call this the bridge exercise too. Lay on your back with your heels on the stability ball and then roll the ball to your butt by bending your knees. Hold top position for one second then straighten legs back out. Do 2 sets of 15 reps.

 

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• Pike with ball: Place your feet (laces down) on the ball and your hands on the floor in push-up position. Using your abs, pull yourself into pike position, hold and then release. Do 2 sets of 15 reps.

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•  Other exercises that go well with this circuit are lunges with weights and squats holding medicine ball straight out in front you. Throw in whatever else you desire such as weights, other core exercises or cardio. I like to do these during a climbing sessions at the gym. It gives me a good break between pumps.

I usually spend about 45 minutes to an hour doing these exercises as a circuit. Chose at least 5 of these to do and begin to incorporate all of them into your work outs and do them properly. The key is to not rest more than a minute between exercises, keeping your heart rate up and burning calories. If you aren't sweating when you are doing this workout then you are resting too long. If you can do this two to three times per week you will see results quick. I know finding the motivation and time to go the gym is hard, but make it a priority, tell yourself the night before that you are doing this and don't let anything stop you. Just force yourself to go! Music helps me a lot when I'm in the gym because lets face it, the gym is boring, especially when you are alone. I like to listen to high energy stuff like techno or electro with a fast beat, it keeps me motivated and energized. Remember, your core is an overlooked muscle group that is very valuable to performing any sport at your highest level. Work it good and treat it right. Power to the core!

P.S. If you have any good exercises that you like to do, let me know in the comments. I'm always looking for new and exciting exercises. Change is good and keeps things interesting.

Ascending

There is something very stressful about attempting to red point a climb when you have no prior beta and haven't even witnessed some dirtbag climb it before you. Every time I lead climb, I ask myself, "Why I am trying this, this is scary!" I get incredibly stressed out, my heart rate spikes, my palms begin to moisten and I feel weak. I have even been known to throw out an obscenity or two. I am not a fan of this phenomenon. My new solution is to drink three quarters of a beer and then attempt to climb. Now hold on, let me explain before you get your panties in a bunch. The beer counteracts my initial reaction to get stressed out on lead climbs by altering my mental state of being, essentially tricking it into thinking I am doing something very timid, but it doesn't hinder my physical ability to puller super hard. Those of you who have never lead climbed cannot even fathom the stress that comes with the sport. But on the other end of the spectrum, when you climb something that is very difficult and you stick the moves, you feel invinceable. This is the reason I put myself in these types of situations. I'm a little sick, when I say, "I like being scared on the rock, it almost makes it fun." But in all honesty, why else would we do extreme outdoor sports if we didn't have some natural inclination to putting ourselves in epic situations that have the possibility of turning out poorly. We like that stuff. It's fun. We feed off each other's energies and learn to just go for it. Sometimes we puss out and sometimes we get the send we wanted. All in all, a day of stressful climbing is always fun and is infinitely better than a fabulous day at work.

P.S. This post was inspired by my current St. George trip. It has been really amazing, the climbs have been anything from immaculate to downright scary, we've put up a lot of routes, the friends have been really really great, the food has been phenomenal, the sleeping sound and the energy has been super positive and high. I'm going to miss it when it's over. Thankyou Alec for throwing this down.

Snowgasm

As soon as I opened my car door the crisp mountain air flooded through my nasal passage, invigorating my soul. I was at 9000ft. elevation, surrounded by breathtakingly beautiful rockies. Snow canvassed the aprons of the amazing geologic formations we call simply call mountains. It was chilly and I was anxious to pop my powder cherry. I was in Little Cottonwood Canyon at one of the few places on earth that still openly practices some form of genocide, Alta Ski Resort. I know, it's still only October, but we received our first kiss from the snow goddess. She blessed us with 3 feet of her of fluffy white ice crystals for all of us winter enthusiasts to enjoy. She is a mystical being that can be extremely fickle with her white gift, but today she proved why we worship her. If you are reading this, oh snow goddess, I LOVE YOU. The snow was extremely light and the terrain was boney, but I didn't care, I was in the snow! I was surfing the white wave! I can say for sure now that I have been bitten by the bug, the poison is flowing through my blood stream, I am infected! Yesterday was just a taste of the amazing platter we are going to be served up this winter. To keep the snow goddess's good faith, I urge all of you to get out there and show her your best snow dance. Take what she gives and enjoy it. Oh, and always pray for more snow! There is no such thing as too much snow.

Look at all that snow!!

Football Mourns Loss

If you followed the World Cup as intently as I did, you may remember Paul, the psychic octopus. He had a gift that not even the worlds' best soccer analyst's could compete with. Paul perfectly predicted the outcomes of all seven of Germany's games and the World Cup Final where Spain defeated Netherlands 2-1. You might be tempted to ask, why didn't Paul predict other games? That is a question that only God now knows (And we all know that the "enlightened" one won't reveal his eternal enigmas ever). Yesterday evening Paul was entangled in death's unavoidable tentacles and won't live to finish his esteemed tell all book on how he had unlocked the secret of life. He is said to have died peacefully while dreaming of World Cup 2014. 

Paul's guilt from picking Spain over Germany may have lead to his death

Those who knew Paul were amazed at how seemingly easy it was for him to predict the outcomes of the world's most important soccer matches. Paul's owner would prompt his psychic ability by placing two mollusks in separate feeding boxes, each labeled with the opponent's corresponding flags, whichever Paul ate from would emerge victorious! Always! Well, at least eight times. Paul's picking prowess turned him into a superstar overnight. But he never let his fame clout his judgment. He was a phenomenon that the world may never see again. Paul will be buried at The Oberhausen Sea Life Centre in Germany, the site of  all his historic prophesies. Stefan Porwoll, manager of the Oberhausen Sea Life Centre in Germany that housed Paul, had these kind words to say about Paul:

"We are consoled by the knowledge that he enjoyed a good life here and that the care provided him by our dedicated displays team could not have been bettered. His success made him almost a bigger story than the World Cup itself. We may decide to give Paul his own small burial plot within our grounds and erect a modest permanent shrine. While this may seem a curious thing to do for a sea creature, Paul achieved such popularity during his short life that it may be deemed the most appropriate course of action."

This is a terribly sad day in the world of football. I ask you all to give a moment of silence to honor and remember Paul at some point today. Peace out Pauly the Oracle Octopus. May god rest your soul.

First Snow!

just plain old glorius

I awoke this morning cold and shivering in my bed and thought to myself, where is my damn duvet cover? It was unusually cold in my normally warm, cozy bed. My mind slowly began to churn and soon I was making butter. The weather forecast that I have been checking at least 5 times a day since last Friday suddenly popped into my head. "There is a winter storm warning in effect for the Wasatch Front with 2 to 3 feet of snow predicted through Tuesday." (use your best anchorman voice for that) I sprang to my feet, threw on whatever clothes were on my floor and ran outside. A mix of rain and snow was gently falling (slush!!) The grass and my car were covered with a fresh blanket of wet snow. In the northwest we call the wet, heavy stuff, "Cascade Concrete." Oh, the memories. The streets were glimmering from the

"tunnel vision"

moonlight and were in stark contrast to the pristine white grass and cars. It was our first beautifully, cold and wintery morning. The season's are shifting here in Salt Lake, winter is coming and we all just got our first lick of it today. It tastes delicious! The transformation has already begun. The ski bums are beginning to return from their long summers of hard work. The gear whores are buying the latest ski and snowboard tech. Ski

everyone loves a snow bunny

bunnies are already planning out their mountain steez. Everyone is getting stoked for winter. Soon enough we'll all be choking on blower snow as we slash magnificent pow turns on the aprons of the Wasatch. I have a good feeling about this winter!

Skiing Jargon

A recent conversation that I had with Leah. And this is literally word for word. And I quote:

Leah: I love to ski!!! (I hear this almost every day from her)
Tyler: I know of a rail you can grind....
Leah: Is it hard?
Tyler: Oh Yeah! And really long. There are also a few kinks to it.
Leah: Do you think I can handle it??
Tyler: Uh, I'm sure you'll eventually get off...
Leah: I hope its not too rough on me.
Tyler: Yeah, you might need some protection for the head tho.
Leah:  I'll be fine, I like getting a little worked.

I know what you all are thinking, and stop it. You are all perverted and immature. We are talking about skiing here. Thank you and goodnight.

P.S. Whoever called me a "fag"...I'm going to find you!!!

Why I Ride

I'm a climber.

I'm often asked why I ride my bike. Any non-cyclist will tell you that riding a bicycle up seemingly never ending canyon roads, struggling up pitches of  more than 10%, heart rate pounding at a steady 170bpm is absolutely crazy. I love it. I love the adversity, the torture and the pain. There's an electrifying feeling that pulses through my veins when I'm deep in the pain cave and the darkness begins pool into my brain. My legs and lungs are screaming at me to quit, but I keep pushing, one revolution, another, don't stop, never stop. It's torture, but it makes me feel alive. There's an amazing physical and mental transformation that takes place. I'm so focused that my mind is finally calm, I'm not thinking about anything else. Not work, not what I need to do, not what I've done, not this, not that, no mental calculations, not even her, it's a wonderful thing. Most days the pain never stops, but once in a great while I float on cloud nine. I feel invincible, I'm a machine, I prance like a mountain goat straight up sheer cliffs. I feel no pain and am able to push myself farther than I ever imagined. Even on bad days, no matter how awful I feel, I never turn around because I know that when I reach the top, the dopamine will be coursing through my blood and I'll get that feeling of absolute euphoria. I'm high. Then the real fun begins as I bomb downhill at 40+ mph, tucking as tight as possible to see how fast I really can go and banking hard into turns like a giant slalom ski racer. I swear, if it weren't for my sunglasses, my eyeballs would be ripped clean out of their sockets! I'm in the zone. This is why I ride.

Anyone But United!

Q: What the difference between a Manchester United fan and a vibrator?
A: Manchester United fans are real dicks! (bahahahaha)

I really hate Man U. I love to see them lose as much or more than I like to see Arsenal win. Isn't that messed up? Everyone associated with them is a bunch of wankers, their players, their fans (Brian Emory) and most importantly, their manager, Sir Alex Ferguson. Stupid England knighted a bloody football manager!

That is good journalism

The tosser thinks he's God. He's had a number of personal rows with his superstar players and subsequently they have all been transferred. Recall, his infamous kick of a soccer boot in the locker room after their 2-0 defeat toArsenal that struck David Beckham in the face, resulting in two stitches above his eye.
From then on, not even a thousand stitches could fix their relationship and Beckham was gone within four months. Other United stars have seen their marching orders because of similiar rifts with Ferguson, including Eric Cantona, Ruud Van Nistelroy, Roy Keane and Carlos Tevez. I can't recall any other manager being more of a dick than Sir Alex to his players. Maybe he should be relieved from his throne?

Does anyone else see Cabbage?

And now it appears Wayne Rooney is on his way out of United. Sir Alex has made a real dog's dinner with England's ugliest footballer, a beast of a boy that has a striking resemblance to cabbage. He's the only player at United that can single handedly take the game by the scruff and shake out a win. No doubt he's a real ass on the pitch, but one cannot deny his world class skill with a soccer ball. But in all honesty, I could care less if he broke both his legs and could never play for England again! Rooney has publicly stated that he wants out of United and Sir Alex has only confirmed. So, where will Wayne end up? Maybe Real, Chelsea or Man City. Wouldn't that be something if he followed ex-teammate, Carlos Tevez, to City? What a slap in the face that would be to all of United. I'd love it!

The real question is what is United going to do? Continue to let old man Ferguson chase out its star players when they become bigger than him? That's perfectly fine with me. United is on a downward spiral right now and doesn't have a touch of class on the bench to fill in for the out of favorite, Rooney. They are going to continue with their mediocrity because that's all they have. They'll be lucky to finish in a Champion's League qualification if Rooney leaves. Sir Alex has no faith in his current crop of players and I don't blame him. He can't even pick a constant starting XI. This is going to be a great second half of the season for Man U. Fine by me.

Good times in Taho

Emory, I'm sorry if I offended you. You're not really a wanker. I love you buddy and I genuinely miss you. But, as you know, I really really can't stand United. I hope you know I had a lot of fun writing this blog. Keep that United passion burning. Literally, burn all those stupid Man U souvenirs.

America, Land of the Obese

"More people die in the United States of too much food than of too little."   - John Kenneth 

Everyone has heard that totally cliche proverb, "Your body is a temple, so treat it that way" a thousand times. I've heard it so much that it's completely lost its meaning to me and probably every other American. But, If you don't worship your own body, who will? Some sorry desperate loser looking to get laid while in throes of an alcoholic binge might. But who wants that? Seriously.

mmm a fat midget stripper

Most people that knew me in my younger days would be surprised to hear me touting about the importance of taking care of your body through diet and exercise, but I've changed. I've evolved from a skittle and mountain dew, high-fructose sugar crazed addict into a fitness freak, all thanks to the greatest invention in the history of mankind, the bicycle. Co-workers poke fun at me in the break room for eating so healthy. Some people just don't get it. I know I'm not the healthiest person on the planet, I drink alcohol, I indulge. But I avoid the gut bombs, the downfall of American health, Fast Food Restaurants and I exercise...a lot.

this kid probably already has type II diabetes...poor bastard

Now onto the good stuff. Foods that boost your mood and energy levels. I'm talking about those foods that release a little wonder chemical called serotonin (controls feelings of well-being) and are packed with protein, fiber, omega 3 fatty acids, magnesium and whatever else your "temple" desires. Not what your taste buds desire....Here are a few foods and guidelines for a better sense of well-being throughout your day:

• NEVER EVER skip breakfast!! It's the first thing you put in your body since that snack you had last night at 9pm. It's like not filling up your gas tank and trying to drive your car on empty, you're gonna run out of gas eventually. Try eating oatmeal, muesli, yogurts, kachi cereal with soymilk. Basically, anything with fiber and protein. Proteins are your bodies building blocks for converting what you ingest into usable energy. 

too pretty to eat...I think not.

•  Snack often! Don't base your day around large meals and starve yourself from meal to meal. Its hard on your digestive system and slows your metabolism. Instead, eat small portions every 3-4 hours. Eat before you get hungry.

• Avoid foods that cause your blood sugar to spike and then plummet. i.e. foods with high fructose sugar (candy and sodas) and bad carbs, like white breads and packaged pretzels. Go for whole grains, your body uses them at a much slower rate, keeping your sugar levels at an even keel. 

high fructose = devil

• Drink lots of water. Dehydration and fatigue go hand in hand. Some studies suggest even mild dehydration can slow your metabolism. 

Hydration is key!

• Everyone gets cravings for something sweet at some point throughout the day and most people turn to sodas, candies and baked goods. BAD IDEA. Instead, get the sugar from fresh fruits or a piece of chocolate. 

Happy Food!

•  Indulge in moderation. Don't eat two or three cookies, you piglet. Eat one. Have a few french fries, not the entire carton. Grab a small piece of candy, but don't take a handful. It's ok to indulge, but what isn't ok, is when you can't control yourself. If you have control issues, sometimes abstaining is the best idea until you can learn to curb your urges.  

If he can, so can you!

• Here's a quick list of some of my personal favorites for grab and go snacks: pb & j, mixed nuts, bananas, apples and peanut butter, peaches, any fresh fruits, carrots, string cheese, yogurt w/ crushed nature valley oats bars, cliff bars, chocolate milk and popcorn. 

• EXERCISE. Get out and do something. Even if you don't feel like it, do something, it will make you feel a lot better. Remember that wonder chemical....serotonin. Whenever you exercise this is released into your blood stream and gives you what some people refer to as "The Runner's High." 

Runner's High

I'm certainly no expert, but I know what works for me and thought it might be informative to share my ideas. Diets don't work, but forming smart and healthy habits do!